im a boring friend .. i wont go up small stage to perform for fun .. i dont know why but im afraid . i am not a friend who will skip class just to go out .. im sorry but i am such a boring friend who don't do stuff like this .. im sorry that im not fun to be with , im sorry that i don't fit in but i try to be . i can tell that i dont fit in cause im not unique .. i noticed everyone of my friends have their own way of behaving .. but i don't ... i'm so empty .. i am the way i am now is buying see-ing and hear-ing how people talk and behave then edit them into my memory .. i dont have my own unique-ness
lol i wonder why do i always walk at the back alone when my friends are at the front .. why cant i just jump in to my friends conversation ? why ? am i like this? lol.. so far only a few guys notice.. no other else noticed it . guys eh ? ... but what touched my most that.. a girl actually noticed it that im walking alone behind and pulled me .
lol its not like im a lesbian . i meant... usually your GIRLFRIENDS will have fun tgt .. yeah .. have fun and forget you .. but to think that one of them will notice while the others just continue .. maybe cause while the girlfriends are talking about a topic then one of them got bored and turn behind and find me . LOL well .. i wanted to have a friend that is like best friend. not those whom you gossip together but soar together .LOl wth.. not friends that want to make you turn bad .. but the friends who will worry for you .. not friends who just claim themselves to be your friends. such friends are hard to find...only people who think the way like i am will really look for a best friend . i dont want to be a friend that we just go out and gossip . i want to be a friend where they can let their feelings out infront of me. lol wtf im talking.